J.J. Abrams’ giant monster movie Cloverfield opens today, and it’s still a mystery as to what the giant monster is. We here at GGL Wire don’t have any special information you don’t — but we have given it some thought, and we’ve identified ten things the monster from Cloverfield is not.
Cloverfield is not a giant field of clover.
Cloverfield is not Xenu, the evil alien overlord from Scientology.
Cloverfield is not Amy Winehouse on the third day of a drug-and-alcohol-fueled bender.
Cloverfield is not the Black Smoke from Lost.
Cloverfield is not the epic boss from Gears of War that you never get to fight.
Cloverfield is not the Matthew Broderick “Godzilla.” We hope.
Cloverfield is not the Katamari Prince.
Cloverfield is not a giant rock lobster.
Cloverfield is not Rosie O’Donnell.
Cloverfield is not the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man.
And finally, djWHEAT’s fave — Cloverfield is definitely not Ursula from The Little Mermaid.
